Myth Busting Happy
Updated: May 26, 2021
Stop Believing the Lies that are Keeping You Stuck!
Are you willing to drop your excuses that are stopping you from even trying to be happy?
It’s easy to be held hostage by seemingly logical explanations and justifications as “proof” that happiness is not possible for you. That’s just bullshit. Your right to happiness is inherent to you and available for all. And it has absolutely nothing to do with any story being told to you or by you.
My one ongoing wish as a child was to be happy. But, I struggled for a long time with feeling unworthy, like my happiness needed to be bestowed upon me by someone of higher value. I would hear the voice of my father telling me that because I was born, I had ruined his life, and I didn’t feel deserving of anything, let alone happiness. I didn’t know that I could simply Be Happy. And I spent far too many years believing many of these myths as totally accurate. Uncertain how to proceed, it took a lot of yearning, stumbling, seeking and learning through trial and error to know that I’m as worthy and able to be happy as the next person.
Yes, we all have a happiness set-point (the most anyone can achieve). However, there’s still room to accentuate and grow your happiness if you allow yourself to. Unfortunately, there are many myths, lies and misinterpretations you may have been told or inferred that you’ve either consciously or unwittingly believed. Since you can’t change what you’re not aware of, let’s take a look at some of the many thoughts that might be stopping you from believing that you, too, can be happy:
I need to deserve it:
By achieving this one big, audacious dream goal first
Fixing something that’s wrong with me first
By struggling more
By becoming a kinder person
By figuring out how to somehow earn it
I’m waiting on another:
To achieve their desired result
To be happy
To make me happy
To live up to my rigid expectations for them
To fix my loneliness
To stop going through hard times
I’m not sure it’s possible:
To actually be happy
For it to exist in regular everyday life.
For someone like me, because I’m:
Cool and trendy
A significant person
A responsible, mature adult
A serious person
A nuanced, complicated person
I’ll focus on being happier, once:
I’m less busy
My life is less complicated
My career is secure
My kids have grown up
I don’t have to worry about money
Things are perfect
I’m not sure how others will react, and:
I’m concerned about upsetting others
I’m wary about alienating others
I’m afraid people won’t want me anymore
I’m worried I’ll be seen as selfish
I don’t want to be seen as a silly, frivolous person
I’m not sure it’s worth the effort because:
It’s too hard
It takes too much time
It’s not a sustainable goal
I don’t have enough control over my life
I have trouble being in the moment
Being unhappy is very familiar to me
I continue to fuck myself up by:
Having massively high expectations for myself
Believing that I just need to buy one more “needed” thing
Being over-committed and super stressed out
Magically hoping tomorrow will be better, without making one single change
I have these emotions stopping me:
Feeling guilty for even wanting to be happy
Afraid to be happy
Afraid to become happy and then lose it
These limiting beliefs are holding me back:
I’m not strong enough
I’m not smart enough
I’m not attractive enough
I’m not rich enough
I’m too old
It’s only for the lucky few
I always fuck up
I’ve never been happy before; why would I be happy now?
Okay, that was a long list. You may have found some of these myths applied 100% to you, some you could kind of relate to, and others were not true for you at all. YAY! Having this type of knowledge is an essential first step on your path towards happiness. And seeing each of these as the EXCUSE that is simply holding you back is powerful. Now that you know these are excuses, you can start to move forward with real solutions towards being happy.
Help yourself feel even more deserving of starting your happiness journey…
For each myth, you strongly identified with, come up with a rebuttal thought, point or story. I want you to find a way to prove to yourself that what you thought was true and holding you back was a complete lie!
“Your perspective will either become your prison or your passport.”
Wishing you happiness always,
You’re ready to come work with me if you want to Discover Your Happy with personalized support, guidance, and strategies that work in the real world. Let’s Talk Happy! To get started Click Here .